Just quickly, I’d like to say sorry for my lateness with this post. I’ve been meaning to get around to this for some time but I’ve been working on a very important project in collaboration with my couch and my television.
(NOTE: I am too lazy to find a non-Vevo, embeddable version of most videos, mostly because it is nigh impossible. I apologise for this, but I’m sure you’re all capable of right-clicking and choosing ‘Watch on Youtube’, or using YouTube yourself. I hope. I think this one should work, though.)
I’ve intended to cover this song ever since it hit number one. And really, I can’t say anything else before I talk a little bit about their band name. Yes, yes it is LMFAO. Yes, yes it does stand for ‘laughing my fucking ass off’. This is a real thing whose success people are facilitating. This is a real thing that has happened.
I don’t know much about the two dudes who are this band. And, you know, I don’t want to make generalisations about them, because they COULD be really nice! But like, well:
The most important thing when a band is first starting out is the name. I mean we’ve got great music but what are we going to call ourselves? So I said to Foo, “We’ve gotta start with the bare essentials, we have to strip ourselves of everything”, so we looked at ourselves naked in the mirror, and Foo said to me “What do you see?” and I said “My package is bigger than yours”. He then turned to me and said “No, no, no, not that. Don’t look at that, look at the whole thing”. I said “Two sexy dudes”, and that was our band name for a while, “Two Sexy Dudes with Big Packages”. So we told our friends, but they didn’t like it, I mean they were like, well you could just be “Two Humans”…
So I told my grandma about our dilemma over iChat, and she was like “LMFAO, you can’t be serious!” and that became our band name for a while; “LMFAO, You Can’t Be Serious!”. But that was too long and we couldn’t get the URL because there were too many characters, so we cut it down to LMFAO and that was that.
I mean, I don’t want to say they’re terrible, awful people but…shit. What else do I say? How else does a rational human being say in response to that? Every year, the venerable A.V Club, to whom I attribute a significant portion of my pop culture education, runs a feature on the worst band names of the year. In 2010’s list, there are some doozies. ‘Alaskan Thunderfuck’, ‘Sex Unicorn’, ‘Dadfag’, ‘Man/Ass’, ‘Bad Tits’; all bands who you’d probably see based solely on their name alone because, though terrible, they’re kinda hilariously genius at the same time.
On the other hand, the feature also lists the cringe-inducing likes of ‘Children Of The Almost’, ‘A Sonnet To Silence’, ’40 Oz. Fist’, and ‘Hogz in Dandyland’. It is with these ludicrous brainfarts of the talentless that LMFAO lie. Okay, I get it – you’re fun, you’re not supposed to be taken seriously, whatever. There’s a line, you know? If you want to be fun and not be taken seriously, call yourself the brilliant ‘Misantropical Painforest’, or ‘The Electric Assholes’. Don’t use a lazy acronym that has existed more or less since the dawn of the internet and is perpetuated solely by text messages between 13 year olds.
LMFAO describes their music as ‘party rock’. Even if I could get past the terrible band name, the song name is the next hurdle. Perhaps I’m a traditionalist, but if you put the word ‘rock’ in your song title and it’s not referring to something you throw at religious door-knockers, HAVE A FUCKING GUITAR IN YOUR SONG. HAVE FUCKING REAL LIFE DRUMS. HAVE SOMEONE WITH A REALLY TERRIBLE VOICE SINGING BUT WHO GETS AWAY WITH IT BECAUSE THEY KINDA GRUNT INSTEAD OF SING. This song is the spur I’ve needed for some time to post about mainstream rock being dead (or, at the very least, in a coma) so look out for that post sometime in the future.
You are electro-pop crossed with hip hop. Don’t try and masquerade it as something else. The song itself follows what I’ve dubbed the ‘Who Gives A Fuck About What You Build Around It, Just Stick In A Shitty But Catchy Club Breakdown And Your Work Is Done’ method of current pop song-writing, the popularity of which I would largely attribute to The Black Eyed Peas, just in case we needed another reason to drag them before the Hague.
The only lyric you need to pay attention to are the words, “Everyday I’m shufflin’.” Now, I may not be ‘hip’ or ‘cool’ or ‘not socially retarded’, but I pay attention to trends and stuff. When did shuffling become a thing, though? To my mind, shuffling is what happens in casinos, the name for awkward teenage white boy dancing, or more importantly, what zombies do. When did it become the ‘it’ dance? What happened to flamenco?! Am I that out of touch?
And you know what? Despite all of this, this song is infectiously catchy. There’s a very good reason it’s number one; once its in your head its there for at least a few minutes. So well done, them. Also, I appreciate the cleverness of the clip, I guess, and the dancing – which I suppose I have to call shuffling from now on, sigh – is kinda cool. Also, as Brendan Maclean has more or less pointed out as being a thing, jesus christ do they ever dress like Yetta from The Nanny! SERIOUSLY:
So perhaps, despite not having an awesomely dumb name like Buttdouche or something, I guess LMFAO’s inspid name can help them just scrape by as being fun and un-serious. FOR NOW.
P.S – “Everyday I’m shufflin'”? Psst internet, how about a mashup between this and Poker Face? You’re welcome. In the immortal words of the Bluths, that was a freebie.