Feature: This Is What Glee Really Looks Like, Episode 1

[in hallway of McKinley High]

Rachel: “EVERYBODY OUT OF MY WAY, I AM RACHEL BERRY AND VERY IMPORTANT!”

Random passing student throws a Slushie on her, deservedly.

Rachel: “WHY IS MY LIFE SO HARD? LOOK AT ME, A PRETTY AND TALENTED WHITE GIRL IN APPARENTLY THE RICHEST PUBLIC SCHOOL IN AMERICA, AND I HAVE PEOPLE THROWING SLUSHIES ON ME. THIS MUST BE BECAUSE THEY DON’T UNDERSTAND MY OVERWHELMING PASSION FOR SINGING AND NOT BECAUSE I’M A HAUGHTY, SELF-IMPORTANT BITCH WITH THE KIND OF MOUTH THAT MAKES JULIA ROBERTS CONCERNED ABOUT HER CAREER.”

Rachel bursts into soap opera tears, and Finn enters.
Finn: “Hey, look, I know we’ve dated like…4 times before and we kept making out with other people for no real character-motivated reasons, but I think you’re totally smart and pretty and let’s hook up again.”

Continue reading

Advertisements

Welcome to Charting Pop

Greetings, friends! Welcome to my new blog. As you may have extrapolated from the various places it is on your screen, it is called Charting Pop – which is just the kind of witty wordplay you can come to expect from me.

In short, Charting Pop is about pop music. As someone with older siblings, I was guided towards their musical preferences, which just so happens to be indie/alternative. Now, I know what you might be thinking at this point: “Oh boy, another hipster setting out to talk smack about pop music”. Well to that I say, kinda. In reality, my mission here is to further broaden my own appreciation of pop.

Despite the apparent simplicity, it is easily the most complex and nuanced of music genres. Each pop single is delicately designed, crafted and optimised for maximum sales, yet there is often still a straw-clutching grasp at artistic integrity – or at least, a pop star will try and claim that they have it.

Now, I don’t mean to be quite so reductive in my description of pop music. I’ve found that as I’ve slightly matured from a 15 year old who hated on almost everything outside of what he liked, to someone who is secure enough in their own tastes to [admittedly, begin to, I have a ways to go] be able to both accept those of others and, as the case may be, come to appreciate aspects of them as well.

A small disclaimer here, if I may: I am no expert, merely an enthusiast. I have no reputable critical opinion but posts on this blog will have me criticising songs and artists of all kinds, and I leave it to the discretion of the reader to evaluate the worth of said criticism.

My ultimate aim here is humour. Yes, I’m going to absolutely trash some songs, but there are definitely others I won’t. I can’t promise you’ll agree with my assessments of things either. The site will be very bare-boned for the moment, but I plan on introducing various segments which will occur once or twice a week maybe, to coincide with regular (attempted) daily posting.

So thanks for reading, I hope you’ll enjoy everything and I hope I get shitloads of people reading this sucker so I can get me some ad money. To close, one of my favourite pop songs of all time. Seeya later!