Feature: The Black Eyed Peas’ will.i.am is the Hitler of music

How’s THAT for an attention-grabbing title?

To explain this outlandish statement, I’ll firstly say that this is not a comparison I make simply to will.i.am. My theory is that, if you were to conduct an appropriate survey, Hitler would come out on top as the person considered to be the ‘worst’ or ‘most evil’ in history (the analogy still suits if you consider, say, Stalin or Pol Pot to be worse). Therefore, in all other areas of life, there must be something with which you can equate Hitler’s evil. For example, Josef Fritzl would be the Hitler of incest, Two and a Half Men would be the Hitler of television, George W. Bush would be the Hitler of Republican presidents, Glenn Beck would be the Hitler of fucking idiots, and so on, and so forth.

Thus, my hypothesis is that will.i.am has the highest magnitude of Hitlerness in music. This isn’t to say that he has committed genocide against an entire race of people killing millions ALTHOUGH I have yet to see any evidence proving this to be false!! What follows is my argument for will.i.am’s title of Music’s Hitler. If you happen to disagree with me, please feel free to rebut with another suggestion in the comment section!

Continue reading

Advertisements